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Demystifying dying

A new Australian book which aims at ‘demystifying’ dying – ‘Dying to Know: Bringing Death to Life’ – aims at helping people to talk comparatively positively about death and organising their own farewell.

The book is published by Pilotlight and the group’s founder Jane Tewson said that “death is pushed into a corner; no one talks about the old. But I don’t think the book is about death really. It’s about life – bringing death to life”.

A simple illustrated book, it offers 60 “thought buds” on dying ranging from information about being your own funeral director to stating that it is “not crazy” to set an extra place at meal time for one who has died. “Pour their favourite drink and tell stories about them. You’ll probably all cry but that’s normal.”

Andrew Knight, a co-creator of the TV series ‘SeaChange’, helped with the book and said that although the simplicity of the advice might lead some people to see it as trivial, a more profound book could end up not being read. “It’s quite a liberating thing to say ‘I’m going to die’ – but so many of us check out unprepared” he said.

The book includes the experience of Kerry Hancock who has suffered from ovarian cancer for five years. She wants to go out in a “blue box” adorned with flowers that are “red, yellow, and purple – bright flowers”. And her valedictory song would be Cindy Lauper’s ‘Girls Just Want to Have Fun’.

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